Question about Ex's...
Is it your business as to who your Ex
is seeing or
living with,
where they are working (i know its not a hushhush thing) just putting it out there.
, and if they leave town and leave your kids at someone elses house with out asking if it is ok. EVEN tho it is their weekend to have them?
When you ask them these questions their response "dont worry about it, its none of your business and you cant dictate to me who I can see or not, live where i want to or not, work where i want to or not. AS FOR kids staying somewhere else, THAT IS MY decision since it is MY weekend and frankly its none of your business"....
I have gone through this. I feel your pain.
It is your right to know where your children are at all times. But unless you have very strong concerns as to who your ex is seeing (like if she's a prostitute or a drug addict) they try not to make a huge issue out of it. He should be going away on the weekends when he does not have visitation. However, many men have their heads up their heads up their a$$es when they meet someone new. If you are seriously worried, try looking for them on facebook or look up an online report. You can even ask a private detective to help you out., listed in the yellow pages of course :)
Again, last resorts. Don't do them unless you are certain there is something wrong. Or you could just end up lloking like the spiteful, jealous ex.
It is your right to know where your children are at all times. But unless you have very strong concerns as to who your ex is seeing (like if she's a prostitute or a drug addict) they try not to make a huge issue out of it. He should be going away on the weekends when he does not have visitation. However, many men have their heads up their heads up their a$$es when they meet someone new. If you are seriously worried, try looking for them on facebook or look up an online report. You can even ask a private detective to help you out., listed in the yellow pages of course :)
Again, last resorts. Don't do them unless you are certain there is something wrong. Or you could just end up lloking like the spiteful, jealous ex.
M/C 10/18/10 9w2d...forever loved
It's a boy!
I'd keep a journal of the times this sort of thing happens. Then, take it back to family court for a modification in the visit orders (the Judge may also place stipulations on the visits). That's sad that the kids don't come first for ONE frikkin' weekend! So sorry your ex is a douchebag... your kids deserve better!
Start weight: 306 Surgery weight: 282 Current weight 199.5
Ralph Z.
on 12/12/10 12:40 pm
on 12/12/10 12:40 pm
Hi Harleymama,
yes, it is your business - what if you want to contact him at work/ home if an incidence arises when you have the children or you have a childcare issue and want some help.
As for living with, yes, that is also important, they, I presume will be playing a part in your children's lives.
Also, as someone else stated, he should have gone away when he didn't have the kids, or swapped time/ weekends with you - or even communicated to you that he was "planning to leave them with so and so - would you be happy with that?"
Just reassurance that you're not being paranoid. I have no experience with divorce/ separation myself but have a lot of friends who have and I see what works and what doesn't. He doesn't sound very co-operative. - I hope things smooth out for you.
Becky x
yes, it is your business - what if you want to contact him at work/ home if an incidence arises when you have the children or you have a childcare issue and want some help.
As for living with, yes, that is also important, they, I presume will be playing a part in your children's lives.
Also, as someone else stated, he should have gone away when he didn't have the kids, or swapped time/ weekends with you - or even communicated to you that he was "planning to leave them with so and so - would you be happy with that?"
Just reassurance that you're not being paranoid. I have no experience with divorce/ separation myself but have a lot of friends who have and I see what works and what doesn't. He doesn't sound very co-operative. - I hope things smooth out for you.
Becky x
There was a stipulation in our separation papers (we later took it out for the divorce paperwork) that defined the parameters of who could be around the kids while in each other's custody. It stated something like "the kids will not be around a person of the parent's oppposite sex after 8pm and before like 7am" and if the kids are around a sex offender then the parent has 30 days to contact the other one in writing that the person is an offender. (the 30 day part REALLY hacks me off- a LOT can happen in 30 days)
I would think that the "opposite sex" rule would apply to others babysitting your kids while your ex goes out of town.
I would also make sure my kids knew my cell phone number so that in case they are ever put in that situation again that they can call you and have you come get them. Legally you can pick your children up from a babysitter. It might be worth getting them a prepaid phone to put in their bags while they are in your ex's care so that in case of an emergency they can call you.
I would think that the "opposite sex" rule would apply to others babysitting your kids while your ex goes out of town.
I would also make sure my kids knew my cell phone number so that in case they are ever put in that situation again that they can call you and have you come get them. Legally you can pick your children up from a babysitter. It might be worth getting them a prepaid phone to put in their bags while they are in your ex's care so that in case of an emergency they can call you.
The more you like yourself, the less you are like anyone else, which makes you unique. Walt Disney
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i was thinking about getting my oldest a cell phone prepaid one that is just for that reason. he is 10, and i know that is a "taboo" age of having one at that age. Just for me i would feel better. Just ****** me off that he sits there and says that he wants kids full time blablabla and then he goes and does this? I mean seriously, since when can you decide what days your parent and your not?
If I told you what happened in May, and June your mouth would hit the floor and say WTF!?!?!? babys dads mom is a "christian woman" who never swears and she said the F word as to what happened those days.
Baby im having is NOT my exDH. thank god for small minor miracles...
If I told you what happened in May, and June your mouth would hit the floor and say WTF!?!?!? babys dads mom is a "christian woman" who never swears and she said the F word as to what happened those days.
Baby im having is NOT my exDH. thank god for small minor miracles...
Get the cell phone for him, it will give you peace of mind.
My daughter's dad and I split up 12 years ago. In the beginning, he and his parents spent a lot of time and money dragging me through the court system and harrassing me. Every time he met a new girlfriend, the CO "didn't apply" to him because he was busy. His parents spent all kinds of money fighting me for special grandparents rights, now cannot be bothered with her because she has a disabilty and can be a handful. They have filed fake police reports against me, lied in court, and God only know what else. the only reason it has stopped is because I married a police sergeant and they are all terrified of him.
Ahhh....sweet justice.
My daughter's dad and I split up 12 years ago. In the beginning, he and his parents spent a lot of time and money dragging me through the court system and harrassing me. Every time he met a new girlfriend, the CO "didn't apply" to him because he was busy. His parents spent all kinds of money fighting me for special grandparents rights, now cannot be bothered with her because she has a disabilty and can be a handful. They have filed fake police reports against me, lied in court, and God only know what else. the only reason it has stopped is because I married a police sergeant and they are all terrified of him.
Ahhh....sweet justice.
M/C 10/18/10 9w2d...forever loved
It's a boy!
I LOVE Karma...when she visits someone else once...lol
Iowa doesnt recognize grandparental rights. (thank god). Supreme court fo the state has even said, there is usually a damn good reason wy parents wouldnt let their kids see their grandparents...i.e. abuse, not being taken care of, the way they live etc....
Iowa doesnt recognize grandparental rights. (thank god). Supreme court fo the state has even said, there is usually a damn good reason wy parents wouldnt let their kids see their grandparents...i.e. abuse, not being taken care of, the way they live etc....
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